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Monday, 07 September 2009

Friday, 07 August 2009

  • Yesterday was interesting and I'm glad it's over. I was just finding it hard to force myself to have a good time in a situation that was not fun for me! I was just smiling and pretending I was... Not fun...

Thursday, 06 August 2009

  • I'm so hurt that no one reads this anymore. I shouldn't have footprints because the reality of how many people actually read this. It's making me sad...

         I wanted to write today about people and how much I don't like them... I'm in a mood right now, that's why... But it's so pointless to talk to them for no reason... I'm convinced most of the time there's better stuff for me to do...

         It might just be that I need to talk to them about things I want to talk about... Like useful stuff instead of the usual bullshit... I'm not good at that though... I can't help but lose interest really quickly and go do something else...

         It's fun to meet new people because along the way you meet actually interesting ones that can make a positive difference in your life... But also in doing that you can have negative experiences...

         I don't want to talk to the people here there's nothing I have to say to them.

    Currently
    Oceans Will Rise
    The Stills
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Wednesday, 05 August 2009

  • We got drunk and made cell phone memos throughout the night.

    Hey yo this jimmy shit sucks. Its dirty and not sophisticated enough for my pretentious ass. But i love it. And Im not being completely honest. There was a gay bitch at the bookshelf who rudely told us it would better if we left because she was fat and i was psychotic and she was insulted and i was homophobic to the naked eye but actually insane from the spatial construction of the entire building and its contents. This place is very dirty and dingy but i still like it. Realization: i'm going to have been alive for a fifth of a century in 15 days. Fjjf bisexual bathrooms are going to be in effect soon due to the blurring of gender lines. Take that book shop girl! With what paraphenilia? What is paraphonelia to you? Money. So an awesome person smiled at me and that made e feel good. I,m playing some super awesome trivea right nowwww woooohoooo. I dropped the person i was with into the sewer as we were holding hands. He just dropped into the Guelph sewage system and ate a new brand of cheap ketchup chips that will be expensive when people catch on to their deliciousness. So i went home and cried about my friend being gone forever and found him sitting on the bed laughing manically. Then we referenced shit.
    Currently
    Untrue
    By Burial
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Monday, 27 July 2009

  • Huge Reflection



    i love Eric Whitacre's music. We played a few of his pieces in band class which I also love and miss. I got to meet him and work with him which is an experience I will never forget. I still listen to his music today and it's some of the only classical music I listen to. I would love so much to play his piece for string orchestra in a good group one day. That is something I want to do in my life before I die. I haven't thought of the things I want to do before that day, but that is one of them. I've been practicing the cello every day now and I think I'm getting better again. It's really hard. I wonder if I will actually persue this finaly or if I will give it up forever. I've been so passionate about this in the past but it's not constant. I have mood swings about it. One second I take it so seriously, and the next I don't even want to look at it. Maybe this involves persistance that I do not have in me. I just live in the moment and do whatever I want at the time. I've always been like that. This brings me to what...

    i hate My attitude. I seem not to care about anything. In onther words, I live my life with barely any regard to what is in anyone's best interests, including my own. I'm trying not to be like this as it is what holds me back the most. For example, the music thing. If I would have persisted through all the tough times with it, I would probabaly be in university right now studying it. But instead when the going got tough I didn't push through it, causing me to be stuck at this point in my life, and thus making it even harder to push through. Like if I would have sucked everything up in the past, I wouldn't have gotten worse and now have to make up for lost time when I am already behind. I'm like this with everything not just music. I was like this with school and my friends and everything I do I'm like this. Not completely but this is what I tend to do, and what I should try and avoid doing. This was a bad section. Let's move on to what...

    i think It is important to consider every angle of everything. Sure it's easy to jump to an opinion without giving much thought to it, but I think it strengthens your opinion when you put a certain lens on things, and look at it in every possible way. Consider every possible angle. I can't think of an example of this. Here's one. If you just heard a song and you don't know what to think of it, you just look at all the different things that make a song what it is. Like every aspect of the music. It's just a way to look at things in a deeper way. It might be fun to see what the song makes you feel without thinking about it, but it's also cool to listen to it several times with all these different lenses on to get an even stronger idea about what this song means to you.

    i believe That anything is possible, regardless of who you are and where you came from. And that box of crayons analogy is so true. That it's not how many colours are in your box or how good the crayons are, it's what you do with them that counts. I apply this to my life in many ways. I believe that it is possible for me to build practically nothing into anything I want. I believe anyone can pick a subject that they have never studied before and master it in no time.

    i feel  Good, but also guilty. I've made several little accomplishments lately that make me feel good like good marks and better habits but I still feel like I've wasted a lot of time in my life. It's bad to have regrets because I should just look at the experience of wasting time and commit to never doing that again in my life, and that way it's a valuable experience. I try to think about it like that, but I can't help but feeling guilty about being like that for so long. I just want to make up for it and catch up somehow, but I'm not typically really productive. Anything is possible, though, right?

    i wish I was a greater person. In everything that I do. I wish I worked harder, did better things, ran faster, and was stronger. I am starting to make an effort to take everything one step foreward. In everything that I do. Practice for a little bit longer every time. The problem is that I'm not the type of person to do this, and it makes me uncomfortable to push myself. I think I talked about the type of person I think I am a lot in this entry and I'm realizing that I should reinvent who I think I am, and tell myself that I am the type of person to work hard and push foreward, and it will actually happen.

    Inspired by: twistori.com
    Currently
    As the Rush Comes
    By Motorcycle
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warnedby

  • Visit warnedby's Xanga Site
    • Name: Andrew
    • Country: Canada
    • State: Ontario
    • Metro: Toronto
    • Member Since: 1/24/2006

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